Patience

I saw this on someone else's blog and I'm stealing it. 


Patience is something that when you are trying to conceive you need to have. 

Most women how ever do not have it but as the cycles go by with out becoming pregnant you learn to have patience. There is no other choice but to learn to have patience and accept it. You can not speed the conception process up, your body will ovulate when it wants. You can not speed up the luteal phase (the time from when ovulation occurs to when your period shows-or hopefully doesn't). For two whole torturous weeks you are stuck being patient waiting to see if this cycle was the one; if finally this step of the journey is over. I have definitely learned to be patient, I have also learned to really take things as they come. I don't always remember that lesson but I have learned it and try to remind myself of it often. 

Infertility and those who have had to go through a long journey to conception learn so much about life and themselves. They learn just how strong a human being can be and how strong their will is.


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There was the possibility of becoming pregnant before my pre-op appointment on October 5, because this current cycle is supposed to end this week.  We didn't "try" this month (charting) but just had sex around the time when I typically ovulate. Since I didn't track it with temping I can't be sure if I ovulated, and when. I admittedly had my hopes a little high but started having that typical cramping this morning.  My run this morning also was  a bit "off", I actually felt sick to my stomach for much of it, and was cramping. Of course it's too good to be true though. It was probably due to just progesterone symptoms, and stress. My period should be here in the next few days because I started spotting.  Per doctors orders, I'm not using the progesterone this month so cramps should be a little lighter, but not by much.  This also means I will spot more before my period gets here. 


Ever since confirming from my doctor that endometriosis is possible, I have been paying attention to the cramping I have.  And some of the pain does originate in my bowels, much of it though in my uterus.  Since he did that bowel check thing I am wondering if it exists there too, not just in my uterus. GREAT. 

Holy Hell Cramps. :(

Well this week has been an emotional week for me. It's to the 1 year point or 13 cycles of TTC and AF (Aunt Flo) should arrive this weekend. Happy Labor day!  And it is hitting me pretty hard. I feel like I always want to cry. And today, I decided to ask to leave work early because my cramps hurt so much. I just started bawling my eyes out halfway home. Just so sad about having another month of this.  I will be fine again in a few days. This whole process just sucks

Then yesterday, first I could not get my coffee because the line at Tim Horton's was too long! Then, at work my toe lightly touched the power cord from my computer and my computer decided to reboot! The last straw in addition to bad cramping was my car not being able to start. It ended up being the battery, which Ryan changed today. But still, OMG! What a horrible couple of days!

Trying to get pregnant for 1 year

Well it appears I haven't updated in a long time.  Since then we have been trying to get pregnant, and I've continued my running. Ran my 13th year of the CRIM in 1:32:02! yay! And Ryan continues to golf of course.

So we have done the temparature charting, ovulation testing (opk's), and I've had the bloodwork and the HSG done (http://www.webmd.com/infertility-and-reproduction/guide/hysterosalpingogram-21590). I have slightly low progesterone and have been taking 200 mg of that vaginally every day. I also was diagnosed with subclinical hypothyroidism (http://www.subclinicalhypothyroidism.com/.) The HSG was very painful by the way! Ryan came with me and held my hand while I cried. Also Ryan has had his semen analysis done. So we are coming up to 13 cycles now of TTC, it will be 1 full year in September 2011.. Who ever thought having a baby would be as easy as stopping birth control? I feel like family is constantly wondering if we are having children, even if they never say anything. It breaks my heart we haven't been able to conceive yet. But it is also possible I have endometriosis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Endometriosis) but haven't officially been diagnosed. My periods are just so painful that one day, I think it is worth getting looked into.

I have heard the "just relax" comment, "it will happen when it's meant to happen" and "just get drunk and have crazy sex!" lots of times. Also wondering if running is having negative impacts on my cycles. I did stop one 2ww (two week wait) and tried not running as much around ovulation (O) and even stopped for a few days around that. No such luck. I run approximately 20 miles per week and often times it is less than that. 

But this summer I trained for and ran a half marathon on June 5 and the CRIM on August 27th. I am just not convinced that running is causing me to not get pregnant. Once, I did run 12 miles for a long run and never got a + OPK that month so possibly, running closer to 30 mpw does start to have an impact. But I hardly ever get up that high unless I train for a half or full marathon. Another full marathon is not in my near future though, as it WILL negatively impact TTC and even if I do sign up and get pregnant, the marathon itself will be miserable! LOL.

Will probably drop my miles to 15 mpw..I do want to run both a 5k and a 10k in either September or October so I do plan to do that. I haven't decided on which races I want to do. But one 10k is September 17th in Fenton and another is October 9 in Ann Arbor.  There is also a 5k in Finlday on September 17th but not sure if we'll be in Ohio that weekend. Decisions, decisions.

OK enough until next time. Thanks for reading!