CD 1

Today is CD 1. Today is a horrible day.

I feel like I could rip out my uterus and would feel much better! I haven't been in this much pain from AF since before I had Joshua. It hurts to go to the bathroom, both to urinate and have a bowel movement. I cannot explain the pressure I have in that area. I even text messaged my doctor but I know he is busy and he did ask if I had a fever.  I don't have a fever or any other crazy symptom. Not thinking I need the ER or anything but this pain is so bad today. :(  I thought at first that this was a side effect of the HSG from last month. But I do not think that's the case. I think what is happening is what I had feared would happen for a long time.

I think my endometriosis is back.

I was blissfully coasting through every cycle after I had Joshua, both while on and off birth control. I have been shocked that every cycle was nothing like it was before Joshua! It has been 27 months almost, since I had Joshua. It has been 7 months off birth control. Maybe this will just be a one cycle thing where I'm in so much pain from AF. But I don't think that is the case. I wish I had percocet or something stronger on hand to eliminate this pain. For now, I sit with a heating pad and using ibuprofen to dismiss the pain a little bit.

I remember reading and hearing that endo does and can come back, but who knows how long it will take to return.  For me I honestly think it has returned with a vengeance!!

I worked from home today. So I was at least able to suffer and cry tears at home. I even did a PiYo workout, which kind of made me forget about the pain. I ran yesterday, Monday, the day my period was due according to Fertility Friend. I was only having a little spotting so it even crossed my mind that I'd be pregnant. Told myself I would test this morning if no AF by Tuesday.

But Tuesday morning came with AF right away, and ever since about 8am I felt like I was dying. I wonder how long this pain will last?!